With Child
by bilkesspawn
Summary: Lucy resolves she and Nelsons 'situation', but Nelson finds himself less than pleased with the result.


**I wrote this kinda hurriedly cause I really wanted to post something on the BE archive, so if it doesn't flow too well and N van A seems OOC and not nearly as religiously inclined, I apologise :) It's pretty much an AU, also Michael Shannon is fucking awesome and Paz de la Huerta's face irritates me.**

**disclaimer:I do not own Boardwalk Empire. If I did I guess I'd own Taxi Driver and Mean Streets too x) if only, if only.**

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There are two small children, holding hands outside the candy-store and singing, each high-pitched note breaking the air with all the consistency of a school bell. Nelson Van Alden wishes there was a law against public singing outside of the church. The voices of the children only reinforce the notion that he shouldn't be a father. He remembered his mother told him once, 'I pray your wife is never with child Nelson; the world is too full of tortured people. Your children would not be the last.'

He had not disagreed.

And now he was meeting with _her_, Lucy Danziger, a whore if he ever saw one. The Devils whore? No. She was no succubus. She wasn't manipulative or clever, there was really very little malice in her, above the jealousy she felt for other, more beautiful more accomplished women. She was just another poor stupid woman who had been force-fed the idea as a child that the only way she could get ahead in life was to bend to the whim of men.

"Would you like to order sir?"

The waiter, a thin androgynous man with a handlebar moustache stood politely on hand. Nelson tapped a finger against the table. "No. I'm waiting for a friend."

"Of course." The waiter bent slightly at the waist, in a curt bow before retreating to another table.

And there she was now, coming around the corner. She approached with the confident strut of a New York socialite instead of some second-rate flapper who could no longer make it in a chorus line let alone as a Ziegfeld girl. He didn't stand to greet her, shake her hand or smile, or even offer a chair. He just grunted and watched as she turned to sit down.

"You aren't showing. Are you wearing a corset?"

Lucy didn't so much as bat an eyelash at how blatantly he approached the subject of her pregnancy.

"I don't wear corsets."

Nelson nodded. He put his hand up slightly, to usher the waiter but she stopped him.

"Don' bother. I only came here to tell you somethin'."

"I was under the impression we were meeting to discuss the child."

"We are. But honey," she leaned forward on her palm, smiling devilishly. "You don't gotta worry about that no more."

The rough hands that had been folded so neatly over his knees twitched and fumbled over each other. His lower lip trembled and tightened a dangerous sign to anyone within his vocal range.

"What are you implying?"The further down the sentence he went, the louder his voice became, and she frowned, her red lips pouting.

"You aint upset are you? I heard even Gloria Swanson got one."

Nelsons mind was reeling. He tried to understand how this woman, this simple, pinheaded idiot woman could do what she had done. He thought of women like his wife who tore themselves up over the fact that they could never bear children and she had gone and killed hers. It was beyond sin. Sin was a part of humanity, that he had come to accept. But killing a child was inhumane.

Lucy took his silence for confusion and rolled her eyes. "I forgot cops don't go to the pictures." She pushed her chair back and stood up. "I gotta go...I got some friends to meet. Thanks for takin' it so well." She gave him her best flirty smile before fleeing the scene.

Nelson sat alone at the table. There was no rage like he expected. He wasn't shaking to kill that woman, to smash the closest thing or run rampant along the boardwalk. There was only a surprising feeling of sadness that where there had once been a child there was no longer one. It wasn't the same feeling his wife had; she felt that a child would make her more womanly, would fill the gaping holes in their marriage and at the same time the gaping hole in her heart. He was regretful that a living thing had to suffer and lose its life over one night that meant nothing to either of its would-be parents.

And as he sat alone on the boardwalk, wallowing in the unfamiliar emotion that seemed to encompass him completely, the two children outside the candy store continued to sing.


End file.
